In the right space

Monday morning - On with the book! Except today this is not going so well. I am struggling today - struggling with motivation and more, struggling with the content and how it affects me when I write. I think every author's writing must be influenced by their own lives and the people they have met. My motivation for writing is to tell a story that is important to me, something that I have lived, breathed and felt. However, I also want my it to be a story not about me, or about the people who influence my characters. Trying to find that middle line is hard, and today I am struggling. I have been writing a chapter this morning that has taken me back into my past. I have had to delve deep into my memory to capture those feelings and emotions... and I now feel wrecked. It's really hard (and beautiful) to go back to those places and this morning I have just had to stop. Sometimes allowing yourself to go back into that world is like escaping off on holiday, off to the sun with all your everyday worries behind you. And at other times, it is just too painful, too dangerous. Today I feel like I am in that danger zone and I need to be in the present. So...book closed for today, fridge raided and distraction hat on. I will try again another day when my head and heart are more aligned, but today is not the right day.

Happy Mothers Day

Jess and I - a Mothers day selfie!

Happy Mothers day!....and what a lovely weekend! Yesterday we travelled down to Dittisham in the South Hams and shared a lovely lunch with some of my husbands friends before doing a spot of kite flying over the river Dart. Today we have been entertaining at home with my parents, in-laws and siblings, and the sun has been shining on us as we sat out in the garden drinking wine!. Normally my mum cooks and we all head to my parents , but today we decided to give mum a break and cook for her. My chorizo and butterbean stew was a hit, and despite the last minute dash to Sainsburys for more cutlery, I carried it off! I have been spoilt by my two children today and as I now type away my husband is doing the ironing! A perfect end to a lovely day!

Proud mummy moment

A busy week has just passed. Parents evenings, A'level drama monologues, a school production (Tues-Sat) and then a Sunday afternoon concert. I am exhausted and I haven't even been involved! (other than taxi duties!)


I am however, the proud mum of a wonderful sixteen year old.  My Jess has been stage managing a production of the new musical, 'The Addams Family', and a few days later performed an amazing duologue as part of her A'level drama. Although I am biased she has a natural acting talent, and a stunning voice and I wanted to share a short clip of her singing on Sunday. A very proud moment :-)

Mondays

Mondays are my writing days. Or shall I rephrase this. Monday is the day that I try to write. It is the one morning of the week that I have to myself. Normally I get sidelined by the washing, shopping ...or more recently rota'd into parent helper role at preschool (this is like going to work for me!),but this week was different. I buried my head for three solid hours and wrote and wrote and wrote.

I am writing a novel. Partly autobiographical, partly fictitious. When I began my story (quite a few years ago now) I had it planned out, chapter by chapter, but as I write I now find that this story takes its own path. 

I am struggling with 'tenses' at the moment. I find that one minute I am writing in the present tense and in the next I am back in the past. Still, I am writing. I have words on paper that take me to another world, and allow me through a door that I thought was closed. Monday morning...we have a date!